It took me awhile to learn what real quality time was or is.    Just being in the presence of one isn’t quality time especially as it relates to children.  I learned over the years that meeting with friends who have children the same age but spending all the time telling the children to be quiet or ignoring them, forcing them to play with one another despite constant interruption from the children means that your children really want YOUR time.  Time spent listening to them, observing what he or she likes, just time with them.  To go further time with them doesn’t mean answering every call or texting friends the entire time and just say “uh huh.” 

Often as parents we want our children to open up, we want them to talk but we don’t give them the opportunity because we tend to plan things we want for them other rather than giving them what they desire or what they require.  Family time/Quality time can be found in some of the simpliest places, ways and times.   Although we can be tempted to recreate moments we enjoyed in our past, the most special moments come from those we create based upon one’s unique family dynamics.  For example, growing up for me it was me and my mom, our time was simple we loved shopping and when we couldn’t really buy we spent hours looking from furniture to accessories.  It was our time to talk, she knew what I liked, I learned what she liked and we discussed everything in between.  At that time there weren’t any cell phones to monopolize my time although my mom wouldn’t allow it anyway, so our time was just that, our time.  I have only boys so naturally although I still drag them shopping from time-to-time our quality times are odd to some but great to us.  From going to the park feeding the ducks to playing on our gaming systems having marathons while listening to music from my son’s laptop; our family time is fun, different but uniquely ours.

The key is giving your children quality time that is uniquely theirs, sometimes they will repeat what they have to say, other times they will tell you more than you want to know but the key is they want to know that you are listening and that nothing is more important to you than they are.  Better to give your children these moments now rather than wish for them later.