SOWING & REAPING, You can’t reap a Harvest in places U haven’t sown!


Have you ever believed in something or someone and was later wrong?  Have you ever invested into people so much, gave so much and at the end of the relationship found out that there was nothing left for you?  Have you ever been wronged and felt the one who wronged you, got off?  Have you ever done the things you thought were right and felt that somehow you were still getting the short end of the stick?  Have you ever given your all to something and it didn’t give it back to you?  I’m sure many of us have experienced at least one of these questions.  You know where you have given your all, have done the things you felt were right and were wrong.  The worst part is that when you are doing something that you think is right, when do you find out it’s not?!

Okay, let’s put this in context. If you invested into a person or loved someone and did the things you thought would make them happy only to find out, it wasn’t enough or it wasn’t the right thing.  How would you feel?  I’ll tell you, mad, betrayed, upset, hurt, belittled and defeated; that’s just to name a few of the emotions.  Think of it like this, you cannot reap in places you haven’t sown. You cannot get a check from the Burger King Company if you are employed at McDonalds.  If you put more time in at work, then you can’t expect your family to be excited or just waiting on you at home.  Of course any man or woman who works to provide for his or her family would disagree and I get that point, to a degree…..however, where your time and energy goes so too shall your harvest.

Sowing and reaping is a principle!  It will stand the test of time, the test of people, the test of product.  It doesn’t matter what scenario you describe you can use the principle of sowing and reaping to determine where, how great and how valuable a harvest could become or not become.  It’s a principle and not a cliché .  The thing is most people tend to do things assuming, hoping and thinking that it will yield a certain return without testing along the way.

A thing can begin one way, and in the process of time, energy, change, seasons, growth, obstacles; the need and desires that were in the beginning have shifted.  If a person remains with the original plan for the sake of keeping the plan, all the work, the sowing will be in vain because what he or she hopes to reap will not be the same.  Let me give you an example.  Since we are using the terms, ‘sowing and reaping’, let’s use crops.  A farmer can begin or set out to plow the land for one crop and based on weather, climate, changes in the weather or seasons, realize that the original plan, while it was good at the time may require twerking.  Okay, first let me say this is a simplistic so don’t go too far and miss the point.  In the example, if the farmer had not cultivated or revisited his plan, meaning continued researching, continued watching weather reports, continued reviewing the plan;  he or she would have missed the signs that told him or her that the original plan should be aborted.

Relationships are the same way.  Two people begin in one manner but hopefully, prayerfully, both parties will grow.  Without revisiting with one another, without talking and making sure along the way that the needs of each partner are met, it is easy for one to outgrow the other person and separation enters.   It is possible to sow in a place for the right reason and still not reap the harvest one desired.  It’s possible to sow too long, too much, too often and then turn for help, comfort in a place that hasn’t been cultivated.  At that point, one could feel isolated and lonely.  However, expecting withdrawals from places where you have ceased to deposit is unrealistic.

What are you saying?  Simply in 2018, be mindful into the places where you sow!  Sowing is equivalent to planting.  Planting is to give people time, energy, space, attention, emotions, affection; when you give it all in one area in one place you cannot expect to look to another place to reap!

  • Parents we must have jobs to pay the bills, however the jobs do not have to have us all the time!
  • If you work, work while you are at work and stop allowing pressures and attempts to please and prove to others; make you take work home!
  • Learn to unwind, disengage from work on the way home so that when you get home you can sow into your family!
  • Sowing is continually for hours.  BALANCE!  Balance work and Balance Family.  Too often we balance family more than we do work but in the end, when the times are critical it is family we want.  Do not need help or comfort or expect a harvest in places you have neglected!  It will not be there and at that point you can blame no one.
  • Sow into yourself!  NO not buy yourself things, sow into you! Never lose the essence of who you are!  Sow value into you by what you say to yourself, how you see yourself.  Strengthen your strengths and starve your weaknesses.
  • EVALUATE! EVALUATE! EVALUATE!  We need to be scientists of our own lives!  Stop going through the motions, having the same arguments without reflecting on how, why and what causes them!  UUGh!  We quote “doing the same thing expecting different results is insanity” and yet we in our actions, we make no adjustments.  WHY? Because we tend to not evaluate what happened!  Usually, we remember how and why someone made us mad but fail to see how our language, tone, timing or any other emotions affected what or how the other person felt.  We tend to keep our same habits but want different results!  HELLO!  Habits aren’t principles!  They can change and habits will not stand the test of time, etc… because if a habit is killing us, we will and must change or stop it!


If you aren’t sowing the harvest you expect, go back and trace your seeds!



Finding the right employees is really scary and tough.  I’ve worked with many small businesses as a consultant and more of them as an employee.  One of the things I’ve been able to do is understand the relationship, fears, concerns, ideas and thoughts from both sides of the coin which allows me to be an effective consultant.  Employers want to be protected.  Employees depending upon the position being filled are able to see, hear and gather sensitive information about the company specifically financial information, vendors that the employer uses, banking information and more.  The initial impression of a company can be tainted hearing certain sensitive information, not to mention that once an employee hears something he or she can and will discuss the company’s business not realizing that doing so places their job in jeopardy.
Employees are just as vulnerable but in a different way.  Accepting a position with a smaller company gives one access to information, some information you want, other information you may prefer to not know!  Hearing sensitive information can make one skeptical about the company and its ability to be their livelihood.
Bringing the two parties together isn’t easy and most employers are better at doing the business that makes them money than Human Resources and recruiting.  That fear will make employers do desperate things, ask the wrong questions to prevent turnovers which are costly to the company in terms of dollars as well as reputation.
            Here are 5 questions as an employer you shouldn’t ask and employees you shouldn’t answer.  

1) HOW OLD ARE YOU?  Most employers know better and will not ask the question directly but will subtly allude to age by asking questions like “when did you graduate from high school?”  The Age Discrimination Employment Act of 1967 protects workers over the age of 40.  Employers want quality but worry about age in this new world of technology and just how well older people can compete.  There are a multiplicity of ways that you can check skills without breaking the law.  Skills testing in the area of employment will help you as the employer evaluate just how productive the potential employee can be in the office.  As an Employee, advert the question, by saying something witty like “old enough to work for your company and young enough to get the job done.”  

2) DO YOU HAVE KIDS AND ARE YOU PLANNING TO?  A huge NO NO! Of course, the Employer is concerned about giving an employee time off for maternity leave.  The other assumption is that a person with children will want time off and is not able to keep regular hours.  Although this question is illegal, a recent study shows that over 75% of women (of course) interviewed are asked this question.  As an employer, it sends the wrong message.  It’s negative. Automatically, you’re thinking about what or how their life affects YOUR business.  Now while your business is the reason for the opportunity, it’s not a person’s whole life.  Employees spend more time at work than home but to ask this question is intrusive, rude and yes illegal. As an employer, the worse thing you can do is to not plan for an employee to have time off.  EVERYONE needs a break.  Always allow for PTO.  Not doing so is unrealistic pressure.  Whether a person has children or not, their hours of working is the same hours during which any personal business that they must conduct would take place.  Making an employee feel like his or her personal things don’t count is not a good feeling and an employee who feels worthless will not be a good employee for you and your company.  Also, PSA, EMPLOYERS, PARENTS ARE GREAT AT MULTI-TASKING, you cannot be a good one without it.  They tend to prioritize better, respond instead of react and are accustomed to making decisions quickly and under pressure.  These facts tend to work against the misconceptions employers have about hiring parents or potential parents.  EMPLOYEES OR POTENTIAL EMPLOYEES, never answer this question.  Just say something like, “that’s not an issue” (no explanation, no yes or no).
3) ARE YOU MARRIED?  Sometimes used as way to get to know you but at worse case, potential employees this question can be used to discriminate against your sexual orientation.  Employers, these line of questions leave you vulnerable to potential lawsuits.  Again the idea for employers is to determine one’s commitment to the job, but never answer this question.  It’s illegal and unnecessary.
4) WHAT COUNTRY ARE YOUR PARENTS FROM? Irrelevant and again very inappropriate. Fear is most likely the source of this question and this line of questioning can be very uncomfortable for both the interviewer and the interviewed.  In short, this serves no purpose at all.
5) WHAT WAS YOUR SALARY AT YOUR LAST JOB? In some states, this question isn’t legal.  Even if it is legal in your state, potential employees you gain nothing by answering that question.  Also, while it may not be illegal for them to ask, it is against the law for the potential employer to verify your answer.  As an Employer and Employee, educate yourself on salaries for positions according to experience.  Employers complain about quality employees and then refuse to pay employees what they are worth but always want the most for the least! NO! That’s a poor method of hiring and/or retaining quality employees that can build your business and take it to the next level.
Potential employees, instead of answering that question, ask the employer “what is the budget for this position?” Follow up question, “what is the level of expectation for this position?”  Follow up question, “what is the system for reviews and raises?”  Too often employees are degraded for focusing on salary but the employers do the same.  Many gain a sense of just how low they can pay and yet demand the greatest work from.  Again, this mindset works against ‘turnovers.’
Employers, Small Business Owners, should employ the assistance of professionals for their recruiting process.  It ensures that the company and its’ interests are protected and when done effectively, it allows for an excellent work environment for the employees as well.
Human Resources is by far one of the greatest resources for any business.  Fear of the unknown will prevent a company from growing to its full potential.  Outsource these services to professional companies.  Elite Expert Business Solutions is but one of those.



The last blog, I wrote, discussed having a ‘good’ view of oneself.  The view of yourself is directly connected to your level of self-esteem or lack thereof.  While it is important to have a healthy mindset of who you are as a person, it is not good to have a ‘false’ sense of who you are.  In other words, you cannot rewrite the scenario of events to ensure you are always the victim, to imply that anything negative or bad that happens to you is beyond your control, actions or decisions.  We all know that to be impossible, yet it is amazing to me those that share that version of his or herself and the things that they have encountered in life.

I have been writing a book now for a few years.  The 1st version of that book, when I thought I was ready to edit the book, was ridiculous.  As I read the paragraphs, literally there was painful event upon painful event describing what people did to me and how they made me feel.  I recalled events, situations and problems accurately and somewhat vividly but in those situations, it was all about what happened to me.  Never did I have write about my series of bad choices that lead me to be in situations; bad judgment, running from the pains of life, loneliness and even a little despair.  In my review of my past, I found myself embarrassed.  I mean really some of my decisions were down right ignorant.  I couldn’t even really understand the decisions I made or why I made them.  Now let’s be clear, the things that I encountered were real, painful and abusive at the hands of others, however, it was my decision to be and even remain with and under their control.

The point?  Having an accurate view of oneself, means accepting your low times that are directly connected to your weaknesses, you know we all have them.  While it may be embarrassing and painful, in order to, really grow, the truth about who you are, what you have done and how you contributed to your “current situation” is crucial to changing and improving your NEXT Situation.

I am a huge advocate for people being honest and I dislike being around people or having people in my circle who do not care enough to be honest with me. I mention this because, to have an accurate picture of you means having a friend that you allow to “check” you per se. During my period of darkness, those in my circle, never cared for me enough to be honest with me, about me.  It was then I knew I had to change my circle and I did.  People can gain and even gleam from watching you be a failure.  It makes them feel good about their situation.

Having an accurate view of who you are isn’t all bad, nor all good or all victim; it is a combination of your strengths, weaknesses, hopes, ideas, and thoughts.  Once you know them, embrace them and walk in them accordingly, you become powerful beyond your greatest expectations.

Kimberly Davis

LEADERSHIP CHRONICLES, Cont’d How do U, handle Power? Influence?


Leadership is a powerful thing.  Most people want the power it brings, the influence and the confidence that they think being a leader will give.  However, having a platform of leadership doesn’t change who you are.  It only amplifies the person you are already.  Your faults are magnified because now there are so many people watching, your strengths are magnified but at much smaller rate because now instead of being celebrated, people will tend to say, “you should know, you should do”; what was once impressive isn’t so impressive anymore.

Ahhh, leadership.  Power, Money, Control, Influence; they are all a part of the package deal known as leadership.  When one isn’t a leader, it’s easy to see, judge, predict and even determine how another one should handle his or her position.  Yet an opportunity to become or take a leadership role may prove to be a downfall of the one who spent years looking up to a coveted role.

Let’s be clear, no leader starts at the top or starts where he or she ends but there is a very different mindset of a leader regardless of whether he or she is viewed as a leader throughout the journey.  As I mentioned in the last blog, a real leader will always surface without regard to the level that he or she has the pleasure of serving.  So, if he or she is among the workers, he or she will still stand out.  The leadership is there and more importantly the mindset.

However, the journey to leadership isn’t easy nor without hits and turmoil, bumps and bruises and even some mistreatment.  A good leader will not misuse or abuse his power toward or on others once in control. The real test of leadership is the way one handles power, influence and responsibility.

The “wanna be” Leader- imitates the leader prior to him or her.  You can always tell them because they do and say things without even thinking about the implications or reasons for why things were said or done.  Basically, they mimic the actions of people that they perceive to be leaders and more specifically the actions that they like!  These people think leadership is all about control, dictating and fearing people into doing what they ask of them.  They never understood or even thought that people follow leadership and leaders because they are pure, of good report, fair, mature and honest.  You know these types always looking for a scandal because that’s how they think.

The “mad” leader – is the one using his or her position to revenge every injustice.  They watched things that they didn’t like or agree with, no matter how large or how small.  They made mental notes and so in their rise to leadership, they are still operating from the small mind of the follower.  They tend to be more corrective, more discipline and controlling even to the point of micromanaging their subordinates.  They have made it to leadership but still tend to major on the minor!  Like the mad hatter, riddles, rhymes, puzzles, you can’t see the big picture with them and neither can they.

The benefits leader – how will it benefit them!  They are more laid back, the department and/or people runs itself, there are issues that require addressing but they do so only when it benefits them.  Never mind the chaos, the frustration of trying to accomplish work in that environment, or the frustration of the employees/co-workers, it’s all about them and how they appear before and to others as the slime up the corporate ladder.

The Drunk with Power Leader – I think that’s the one, I’ve seen the most and experienced the most and not in a good way!  It’s like being black.  Before I shake hands, speak or begin to discuss myself, you know that I’m black.  My skin color announces me, so if I walked into the room and said “Good morning, I’m black”; people would think, and rightfully so, how ignorant is she?  It’s the same thing for a leader who has to announce and demonstrate their power on every level.  Micro-managing the employees day-to-day activities, ready to implement disciplinary measurements on everything at all times, paranoid about employees wasting time, taking things or projects being incomplete, accusing rather than asking and always ready to hire new people at the drop of the hat.  All signs of a person drunk with power.  You can own the company and be drunk in power.  The truth of the matter is if you know who you are, and understand your power or influence then there is no need to abuse the power.

Abuse is also misuse of power.  There is never a need for consistent threats, or tools to make one feel inferior when you are a leader in fact the leader should do quite the opposite.

Handling power is a sensitive thing and the ability to do so is priceless.  You can always tell a veteran or an elder of power by the way he or she will use it.  Whether they carry it like a torch ready to burn up an offender or if they know how to use the tool to build and inspire others; a leader is known by the people or victims that follow.

If you have been hurt before and you are a leader, then be mindful of the past.  First get help, a therapist that you can talk to about your hurt.  A leader should never feel or see his or herself as invincible but always remain open to get and receive help.   Everyone reports to someone.

Misuse of power is abuse of power and when you aren’t leader enough to get help, think about how many people you are willing to lead into hurt.

Kimberly Davis

“I approve this message”


In life, the people who achieve any level of success, seem to have a defining moment or defining moments.  You know the moment in or of time where things are different, things change, the point of no return.  The place and moment of life where one feels either I do or I die; maybe not the physical death, but all of the other deaths of and in life (socially, emotionally, mentally, and financially); one can have before physically dying.  My defining moment occurred Tuesday November 1, 2016.

Working for a property management company (contract), Tuesday was only my 7th day and it was payday.  For six days, everyone was so polished (as much as they could be).  Unfortunately, this was something I that was not new to me.  I’ve known for about 15 years that I am an entrepreneur soon to become a business owner (those two are different and that’s for another blog).  My gift of business specifically accounting provides me and has afforded me multiple opportunities with diverse companies while building my own business so having said that, allow me to set the atmosphere.   I’m in preparation for the busiest time in my business, end of the year so for entrepreneurs that means tax season is around the corner and simultaneously preparing for Christmas. So, outsourcing myself to a company meaning working as a contractor is typical for me.  It is a typical company for me, million-dollar company with the working conditions of hundred-dollar company or a startup.  Old computers, with older key-boards, paper EVERYWHERE, chaos is the norm rather than the exception.  Coming in on the heels of so many who have come and gone before me for any number of reasons; it was exciting, frustrating, and odd all at the same time.  For me, the work I had been given wasn’t enough to do, not on the level to which I have been accustomed.  I love to be busy and I love doing accounting work which is what I thought I was hired to do but it was a job that paid and paid decently.  Additionally, it allowed me to flex my auditing skills of an accounting; dealing with a company from the inside out, discovering their weaknesses, strengths, grey areas and for this company answering/fighting a lawsuit (which is pretty phenomenal).

Tuesday (November 1st) was the first payday with this company and suddenly everything changed.   There was a nervous and anxious feeling in the atmosphere, poised employees looked frustrated and angry.  I begin to hear how they all really felt.  It would seem that each payday the owner of the company did something to make them wait or feel that they may or may not be paid and today was no different.  I listened, said nothing.  I took it all in.  It’s now 4:30 and every one was looking defeated and the office manager is like “well maybe he’s not coming in.  He’s not responding to my texts or anything so maybe we will get paid tomorrow”.  Then I spoke, “Oh not me, I will be paid today one way or the other.”  Everyone looked startled to say the least.  It’s 4:55 and guess who strolls in, yep the owner.  My desk closest to the door and I looked up at him and gave him a look that if looks could kill would have rendered him DOA.  He settles in his office and then begins yelling out to the employees, *** come here.  He questions her for a minute and she comes out with her check smiling as if she won the lottery.  I wait for a few minutes (because I’m still on his time, he’s paying me to wait for my pay!)  It becomes evident that he wanted to see my response because as he has other employees to do other work or questions them as if making them earn the pay that they have already earned, he never acknowledges me at all.  The office manager and supervisor who has then begun a call that he instructed her to do, looks at me frantically unable to stop me from walking in his office.  He’s speaking with someone and I stand in the door.  He looks up barely, seriously, and says “I’m talking to him.”  I reply, “yes, I know.  Do you have my check?”.  Voice is calm, face is serious and disposition firm.  He pauses and we stare one another down.  I feel my anger mounting and because I have no poker face it shows and I shift my foot prepared to get REAL UGLY WITH him!  Quickly he signs my check, he says I need you to make a copy of it first.  I take it giving him an additional ugly look and never acknowledge what he says.  Yes, I make the copy but I treat him the way he treated me, making him wonder if I did or not.  As I turn to leave, I said, “I’m the wrong one!”

As I drove home, I fussed, and yea said a few choice words (I’m working on that) but when I settled down, I begin to furious with myself.  This man was despicable, ignorant, barely spoke English and no I’m not prejudice against foreigners but he knew nothing and didn’t even respect the laws, this man had been doing business, cheating people, making them wait for their checks, and paying them as contract workers when they were actually employees! For some people, like me, it was fine because I own a business but for others they lived in fear but couldn’t afford to quit, leave or walk away.  AND THAT’S WHERE I begin to look at me!

It doesn’t matter what I said about him, I couldn’t talk about him without talking about myself!  I KNOW, KNEW AND UNDERSTOOD EVERYTHING THAT THIS IGNORANT MAN needed to do in his business.  I saw the flaws in the financial structure, the accounts payables, the receivables, the areas of weakness and strength and yet I WAS WORKING FOR him!  Ummm Hmmm  My entire focused shifted and changed.  Fear of what people thought, who would question me, speaking up, speaking out, frustration over a few clients that fell off, frustrated with trying to teach close friends and even family about where I’m going and a million other insecurities and doubts pushed me into a delay until this day!  YEP MY DEFINING MOMENT!  I’ve heard words before, I’ve spoken and encourage quite a few people and yet always managed to allow people and their influence to be a hindrance to me.

TODAY WAS DIFFERENT!  I didn’t talk, I didn’t explain, I didn’t tell anyone, my actions became different.  Instead of sleeping, when I wanted or rushing to be with the family or allowing the plans and actions of people in my home to hinder me, I stopped and put my efforts into my business.  No more explaining, hoping, no extra calls that were unnecessary, I prioritize my thoughts and actions moving closer to all the things that I know lie within me!

The fear of working for a fool prevailed over the fear of stepping out and maybe failing!



It’s that time of the year.  Catchy slogans promising, anticipating the year you will have in 2016.  Almost every year, there is a slogan attached to the promises, expectations or hopes or desires that individuals hold or harbor.  The Spiritual idea is that some are prophetic speaking into a person’s life, encouraging one of his or her future; mentally the cliché’s are meant to challenge one’s mind for achieving greater than he or she did in the prior year; socially the slogans birth hope in the hearts of those who hear and believe them and lastly financially; there is the promise that better days are always ahead.  This is all true but not true in the sense that most people view it.  While the phrases, slogans and clichés make for great T-Shirts and even provocative thought, it will not be the phrase quoted that will change your 2016 for the better.

2016 Will be An Incredible Year; but only if:

  • YOU DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT!  Doing the same things you did last year or in the last season will ensure that 2016 is the same or worse than last year or even years prior.  Even if there is a possibility of failure to have a new year means having a new mind, a new mindset, having the courage to do something different even if different doesn’t lead to better immediately.
  • DON’T LOOK FOR INSTANT GRATIFICATION OR RESULTS.  It’s not about adding water and stir.  A new season means recognizing the seeds, planting them, cultivating the planted seasons and being ready for the harvest.  There will never be a harvest without work and sacrifice.  Success is always progressive if it’s not you can gain things that you will never be able to retain.
  • REALIZE SUCCESS REQUIRES SACRIFICE!  Whether it be losing weight, completing a degree, finding that new career, becoming an entrepreneur or writing that book; whatever your picture of success looks like will require sacrifice.  Too often we try to succeed without it, taking on more things than we can handle, being everything to everyone except to ourselves; however if one is to have the year you scream and shout about, sacrifices must be made.  Find those areas of “too much”, eliminate them and reach for success.
  • CONSISTENCY IS A MUST! To get a 100% return requires consistency and 100% effort.  Distractions are ever present for any individual who desires to accomplish anything.  Distractions occur so quickly, last too long and leave one forgetful and in a worse state than before the distraction occurred.  To see ANY POSITIVE RESULTS, one must be and remain focus.  Ignore distractions and the people who seem to cause them frequently otherwise next year during this same time you have the same goals.

Dispelling The Myths That We live By:

  • Blessed Means Everything is Good All the Time – In the church community, a blessed person has blessings particularly material blessings. Actually blessings are not material but more physical –having your health and well being, mental – having your right mind and spiritually – knowing that God is real, that HE lives and that in HIM we move and have our being!
  • Bad times are all BAD! – Bad times aren’t all bad. They are unpleasant because they are uncomfortable. No one likes those times and they don’t talk about them.  No matter how many times you hear that these times are part of process of growing there is always a stigma that makes one feel embarrassed.  The bad times occur in all areas and those areas are targeted for growth.  The things one goes through serve purpose but it’s up to us whether we get, understand or allow the purpose to be fulfilled or go through becoming bitter and gaining nothing.
  • Appearances over Reality People would rather appear prosperous or successful rather than ask for advice, seek help and become what they pretend to be. No one is born knowing everything and the greatest advantage one can have is the ability to never stop growing, learning or evolving. It’s never easier to pretend than it is to become although sometimes it may seem that way.
  • PRODUCTIVITY IS CONSISTENT EVERYONE has down time or times that leave them less than productive. It’s natural, normal and okay. Life happens in seasons and there has to be a season of rebuilding, restoration which in most cases means having downtown. Downtown is important so that when one is in a productive season he or she can be effective and efficient.  Don’t be afraid to rest.
  • Comparisons are comfortable There are times when we compare ourselves to others. Nothing is said out loud but we look in our group and set goals, standards and measure our progress against that of those around us. Too often we get comfortable in those comparisons and that causes one to live below his or her level of success and accomplishments.  Comparing only works when you use it as a tool to motivate yourself and compare yourself against the best.  Even under those circumstances comparisons should only go so far and not to become a guide but a tool sparingly.  There is a difference.