“Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me.”  That’s the song we sang, those are the words we played and spoke.   Years later we know better.  Words do hurt and harm.  It’s not just because of bullies or people that we don’t like because the Spoken Word was powerful from the beginning.  It was through Words spoken by our Creator that light and dark formed, that it separated, that the place void and with form, took form and became what we now know as the World.

Words are and have always been important.  We teach our children to not become consumed with the words of others in an effort to protect them, we tell them it doesn’t matter what others say about them.  At the same time our children watch too many of us base everything we do, say and even post based on the perception of ourselves that we wish to give others, all in hope that it will change or control what people they say about us as a person or people.

The wrong words are enough to cause bodily harm to occur.  If you don’t believe it, call a person out of his or her name enough and watch a fight occur.  The wrong words spoken can lead a person into a spiral of depression or running around chasing the wrong destiny.  The wrong words from the right people can make one literally question his or her worth.

Instead of convincing yourself and even your children an incorrect fact that words don’t hurt, change that tone to the truth and begin to teach them as well as yourself how to handle the wrong words.

• NEVER ALLOW NEGATIVITY TO HAVE THE LAST WORD! Even if you only speak it to yourself, when someone calls you something or a group of people call you a word, misspeak about your destiny; speak against their negativity.  Negativity is a weed and it lies dormant under the surface only to surface at the wrong time causing destruction to the mind, body and soul
• BE SELECTIVE ABOUT THE OPINIONS THAT MATTER – Popular? The great thing about the new generation is that popularity is spread among diverse groups. It’s not just the athletes or jocks!  Regardless, remember that not everybody’s opinion is important and you owe no one anything especially to be disrespected.
• TEACH, TALK, EDUCATE TO MAKE SURE THAT YOUR CHILD KNOWS WHO HE OR SHE IS OR IS NOT – Don’t assume that they know who they are. With increasing technology, exposure beyond parent’s consent, people have invaluable access to our children.  Their opinions of who they are begin with us, as parents, however it doesn’t end there. Make sure your voice is loud and present.  Knowing yourself means not just knowing what you like or don’t like because those things change; it means having limits, boundaries.  Knowing what your child will take, how much abuse and how much he or she will tolerate from others and more.  Discuss with your child daily on their experiences, ideas and concepts.
• SPEAK POSITIVE – Some people look at affirmations as a form of religious rhetoric. So call it what you may or desire but it is crucial to not allow negativity to have the last word even if it means speaking to yourself.   Talking to yourself is considered crazy but when you begin to encourage yourself that craziness has become your asset.
• EXPOSURE – Be aware that technology doesn’t always allow us to expose our children to things slowly or even provide us the right to choose when, what and how soon.   Having said that, with the exposure of the real world, make time for questions, clarity and clarity of all and about all questions.
• BE VERBAL – DO NOT ASSUME YOUR CHILD OR CHILDREN know how you feel about them. Tell them.  Just like we are verbal when people make us upset, it is crucial to be equally or more verbal about the things that we do like, the positive assets.  One can only build on the positive not the negative.  So speak life into those you love that they may build not exist, grow and not be stagnant, do things and not wait for them to be done.

 

Above all don’t tell your children that words don’t matter or that words do not harm.  It’s untrue and in doing so, you belittle their thoughts, their ideas and give them a very isolated existence.  Nothing allows or provides more validation for negativity than one feeling estranged among those to whom he or she should feel or have a connection.

 

Your words say everything about you that you attempt to hide.