We’ve been examining change from the standpoint of my original acronym, Correcting Habitual Actions to Nurture Great Expectations.  From the responses, I’ve received it’s been quite an eye-opener and for that I’m grateful.  It’s always my intent to be a blessing as I there are too many times, I’ve felt alone, without information so I try to give as much as people will receive.

Change isn’t easy.  Habits that we employ begin as babies through the things we observe and imitate.  However, not everything we learn; is good for us.  Think of it like this, the people from whom we first learn can only teach what they know.  It’s dangerous and simplistic to obtain all your information about things from one source.  I used to be that way.  If I found a source I liked and respect, I would tend to accept that source’s opinion all things, not just the area of which that source was an expert.  For example, if you learn from your parents one way of managing money, that teaching is a good foundation but as one grows and hopefully exceeds the accomplishment of the parents so too must the method of handling finances, change and expand.  You cannot nor would it be wise to use the same method of handling a larger quantity of money in the same manner one would with a small quantity of money.  Simply put an increase in lifestyle whether it’s an increase in the physical, social or material things to manage also requires an increase mentally.

The thing about one’s habits is that people take their methods of doing things very personal.  Have you ever tried to convince someone that something they do or believe could be wrong?  Boy I have!  Starting with myself!  People are complex and very colorful.  To handle the outside forces of the world, it is easier for us to define things as ‘black n white’, but when it relates to our personal thoughts, concepts and behavior most of us are more colorful than we care to admit.  So trying to take away comfort zones of behavior and thoughts is scary to us.  Some of the things that you have done are life-long attributes and traits; so reviewing them and considering those things to be wrong is really scary and goes deeper than just your behavior.  What does that say about your family, your ancestors?  See it’s not as easy as it sounds is it?

However, the inability to lose or let go of behavior and thoughts that could be hindering you today is hard.  If you let go of the foundation you have, what will you stand on?  The thing is foundations provide support even if the foundation or support is cracked, it is still foundation right?  Right.  Support for most people includes other people, family, friends that share the same belief system as you do.  When you entertain the thoughts that the way things are being done could be incorrect you are taking a chance that your belief system could be failing you and that’s major.

It’s easy for people to encourage you to stand alone as you watch them engage with their family.  Been there, done that!  However, if you recognize that the habits repeated in your life although family born & breed aren’t working, you quickly have to decide if they are worth dying for?  The answer is probably not.  At the same token it’s not required to declare war against everyone else and their way of thinking.  As you seek to correct your habitual actions, here are some ways to NOT stand in your own way.

• Remember your revelation is just that YOURS! Share without pushing it down the throat of others.  Remember your own journey, the amount of times you heard it before you acted, the fear that caused hesitation etc..  Plant the seeds of information and just know the water and increase will come later.
• Don’t be afraid to step outside the box.  Once you recognize things holding you back don’t stay inside to make others feel comfortable, that’s not your job!
• Stand your ground.  The first thing that happens to the one outside the box is ridicule from those inside the box, stand your ground but do not stoop to defending it all the time.  You owe them nothing.
• Don’t overshare.  Branching out, making bold decisions or taking initiative isn’t easy and to prove others wrong or prove yourself right, it’s hard to not want to overshare and over explain hoping to gain support.  Oversharing does just the opposite.  When you work too hard to convince others, it looks like you are trying to convince yourself, so keep quiet and build & grow.
• Don’t worry about proving things to others.  If you step outside yourself, your boundaries of living, if you network, if you try something new and it doesn’t work; guess what?!  You tried something and it didn’t work!  YOU’RE STILL ALIVE AND IT’S OKAY!  Nothing ventured, nothing gain! The greatest failed their way to success.  Don’t give up, regroup by learning from the failure and move forward.
• NEVER FORGET EVERYTHING IS A PROCESS!  People buy and desire the overnight success stories and concepts but those do not exist and they are not real!  That’s why your goal can’t be to impress others; it must be to be successful because the new things you are trying will not occur overnight.  There must and will be process of planting, cultivating, and watching it grow.
• DO NOT THROW AWAY ALL THE OLD SCHOOL OR PAST!  While you may have determined that what you know isn’t working, every system has some good things about it.  Do not forsake all your intelligence.  Proceed out of the box with caution and eyes open.

There are so many ways we stand in our own way of success but 90% of those ways is due to the way we think and process information, concepts and ideas about life.  You cannot think on a higher level than your exposure and so to move to the next level requires one to step out of the box, to entertain another way of doing things.  It’s not easy but the journey is so worth it.

Most importantly know that to do something different is not a negative thought against you or who you are.  That’s not what it means at all.  It means you are evolving and growing as a person.  It means you know that there is more knowledge to acquire, that you are still open to learning which makes your value increase.  It means that you examine your life, your past, your failures and your successes and you are bold enough to do something different to achieve something greater!

 

~~~~~~~Embrace your gift of change and stop standing in your own way!~~~~~